Why The Long Hair?
Every time someone asks me about why I am letting my hair grow long, I try to provide a different answer. Here's the list so far... It's the only hobby for which I have the time and energy to fully partake. I'm like one of those eccentric, billionaire geniuses except that I don't have a lot of money, and I'm not that bright. It's what Jesus did. Why not? It hides my shameful tattoo. It's my pre-emptive strike against male pattern balding. I am going for shock and awe. I'm running a lice ranch. To prepare for my new career as a professional wrestler. Why on Earth did you cut yours?! What do you mean? I just cut it yesterday! It annoys my boss. I lost a bet. Since no matter is created from nothing, I am obviously gaining possesion of a larger share of the existing universe with each additional hair cell. Because wigs make my head itch. To piss off my balding frenemies. In case of sudden homelessness, I will fit in better. I'm planning to start a cul...